We've got a long wait until Game of Thrones returns next March... but fear not! Episodes of Game of Bones, the porn parody from director Lee Roy Myers, will start appearing on the Web in just a couple of weeks. (Including a female Joffrey!) We've got the first exclusive teaser and cast photos, plus an interview with Myers.
Scroll down to see cast photos for Game of Bones: Winter is Cumming, which debuts its first episode on WoodRocket.com on Oct. 25. Not pictured, according to Myers, are "pornified" versions of Varys, Tyrion Lannister, Jorah Mormont, and King Joffrey, "played by a legal-aged female."
Margaery Tyrell played by Aaliyah Love
We talked to Myers, who also did a Buffy the Vampire Slayer porn parody, about creating the first Game of Thrones porn spoof:
Were there any ideas for the Game of Thrones porno that seemed too wrong or evil to do?
Yes. The whole Cersei & Jaime Lannister, brother and sister sexual relationship is taboo. At WoodRocket, we typically try and avoid incest as a running theme in porn.
And then did you go ahead and do them anyway?
Not exactly. But we do acknowledge it. It's a huge part of the series, and if we can't discuss it, we should probably choose different source material. Maybe something less controversial, like Oldboy or A Serbian Film or Smurfs 2.
Given how often the first couple seasons of Game of Thrones would use sex scenes to spout exposition, did you experiment with having pornstars recite random plot details from the series while they were screwing on screen?
Of course! What's a sex scene without, "Ooohs" and "awwws" and "Robb, maybe not going through with your agreed upon marriage was a mistake"?
Robb Stark (Tommy Pistol) and Talisa (Dana DeArmond)
Is your Iron Throne made out of dildos? Please say yes.
Yes. Thank you for the suggestion, by the way.
Westeros is a feudal realm that is attempting to modernize and move toward the rule of law in the face of entrenched power structures, and this process is complicated by the return of magic. How do you feel X-rated sex scenes can help to illuminate these themes?
Sexuality is key to winning wars and losing wars. And while the series adds dialogue to reveal this or a little nudity, we can explore this more fully. We get to penetrate the story. And we will also show magic.
Is there an X-rated version of "the man who passes the judgment must swing the sword?" Who does Ned Stark hook up with, anyway?
Nope. We are focusing on the latest season of the television series. We found that despite Ned Stark's beheading making for some good and sexy word-play, the visuals would probably gross some people out.
Cersei, played by Tanya Tate, and Margaery Tyrell played by Aaliyah Love
What was the weirdest pairing you came up with? Any pairings that are totally not in the books or TV series?
As fans of the show, myself and my co-writer Audrey Palmer, we didn't want to stray too far from what the original story did. It's a parody, but we also want to give viewers the characters that they want to see having sex, having sex. But, I don't want to give too much away. You'll have to tune in to find out who is schtupping who. I will toss out there that the Red Wedding is now anything but a white wedding.
Are you going to show us exactly what Podrick did that was so great?
Yes.
Does Daenerys eat a horse heart? Or is there something else along those lines?
Along those lines: she does stick something in her mouth.
Now that you know Hustler is also making a Game of Thrones porn spoof, do you feel extra pressure to one-up Axel Braun? Is there a sense in which if you play the Game of Porn, you win or you die?
Sorry there's no real drama here. No game to play. We will do our version and then they will do theirs. I'm sure that both will be great. Of course, ours will come out sooner and you can watch it for free on our website, WoodRocket.com.
Actually, come to think of it, how do you turn the "win or die" slogan into something suitably porntastic?
I'd go with, "Win or Die...or Fuck"
How hard was it to create sets that were reminiscent of the sets in the TV show? What was the hardest set to reconstruct?
It was very difficult capturing the medieval architecture look on a budget. But I am confident that people will appreciate the level of attention we paid to the detail. Especially when they see the Throne Room. People are going to blow their loads when they see that set.
And here are some more exclusive (and work-safe!) cast photos:
Cersei played by Tanya Tate
Cersei played by Tanya Tate
Jon Snow played by James Deen
Daenerys Targaryen played by Anikka Albrite, and Daario Naharis played by Aaron Wilcox
Daenerys Targaryen played by Anikka Albrite, and Daario Naharis played by Aaron Wilcox
Daenerys Targaryen played by Anikka Albrite
Robb Stark played by Tommy Pistol
Talisa played by Dana DeArmond
Ygritte played by Claire Robbins